It's Karaoke Night!

I actually went to karaoke night at a local bar recently. I must mention that, in the past, I have had a slight aversion to karaoke, in much the same way you might have an aversion to being stabbed in the chest with a bayonet. It's not that I hate karaoke, it's more of an intense and passionate dislike.


But, on this night, I was invited to this event by some very sympathetic comedy friends. These three comedians were the only comics from a large group of local comedians that I invited to my place for a movie who actually bothered to reply. And, because they already had plans, they were generous enough to invite me to join them! Thanks guys!


So, I decided to take them up on their offer. Even if I didn't exactly care for karaoke, I put that aside in the name of friendship, a friendship made stronger by their concern and sympathy for my plight. They didn't want me to sit home alone, depressed that nobody wanted to watch a movie with me. (For those that never responded, it's too bad, as I happen to have what is techically referred to as a "kickass" home theater setup. Phhhbbblllttt!)


So, I headed out to Sunnyvale for some karaoke! After all, how bad could this particular karaoke night be, if these three smart and funny gentlemen attended on a weekly basis? In fact, perhaps my whole opinion of karaoke was misplaced, and it would turn out to be great fun. I've got to lose these long-held, close-minded opinions, and loosen up a little. It's karaoke night!!!
Well...I walked in, and after only 5 minutes, I knew! Yep. I was totally wrong about karaoke! That is, I was wrong that I thought it could be fun. Yes. Karaoke still stinks like a big pot of boiling feet.


For those of you who do not share my lack of enthusiasm for this activity, or even, due to some sort of accident involving massive head trauma, actually enjoy it, I must share with you a little history of karaoke, so as to set you "scared straight". I might add that I am somewhat of a Japanophile. (Well, I think Asian girls are attractive, anyway.)


The word karaoke is actually two words in Japanese: Kara, meaning "empty", and Oke, meaning "talent". It was originally invented in the 1930's to use as a method of torture against captured Chinese prisoners. Karaoke, as you are no doubt aware, is still practiced in Japan today. But, only as required by law, due to its inclusion in the stipulations of Japan's unconditional surrender to the United States, as punishment for atrocoties they commited during the war.


Of course, this begs the question, why do Americans engage in karaoke, when it is not required by law in the U.S.? One of my theories is that Americans do it because of guilt. They feel guilty for Global Warming, American Idol, George W. Bush, etc, and wish to punish themselves. My alternative theory is that people are idiots.


After much thought and careful consideration, I will go with the latter theory.